


Cold Hands

by ValentineDeimos



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Backstory, Blood Kink, Blood and Gore, Blood and Injury, Gen, Headcanon, Headcanon Backstory, Knifeplay, Lemon, Multi, NSFW, Other, Past, Past!Valdemar - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 10:13:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19249102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ValentineDeimos/pseuds/ValentineDeimos
Summary: The character Quaestor Valdemar, from the visual novel The Arcana, is well known for the uneasy and chilling sensation they cause to the player, with their weird behavior, bizarre appearance, and uncanny presence. Their past is, for us, still unknown.Many do not know about the astounding path they’ve gone through to get where they got. From what made them so fascinated by mournful things, to the roots of their connection with The Death arcana. Not until now.Read and know the story behind one of the most devilish minds in the universe of The Arcana.





	Cold Hands

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, English is not my first language, sorry for any grammar mistakes: x  
> And I’m familiar with both North American and British English, so I also apologize for any terms and grammar mixing.  
> And last but not least, most of what I’m writing here is based on my headcanons, not theories about how Valdemar’s actual past would be. For example, I don’t actually think their real name was Valdemar :v   
> I hope you folks like it <3

The sun spilled its 12 O’clock rays over the city. The streets were moved with people going here and there on their lunch or shopping time, alleys and sidewalks filled with the parasols and top hats of the bourgeoisie. The everyday humor was making its way in the citizens' lives.

Holding a book in one hand and charcoal on the other, Valdemar was finishing an illustration on a board. It was hard to make right through all those curves and edges when all their hands wanted to do was everything but drawing animal anatomy.

“Don’t you suspect that you might be overthinking this?”

Another person came into the office and leaned against the door. Professor Edvan Greyback, their teacher, who just came back from lunch to help them preparing the things for the meeting. The doctor quickly greets him, and come right back to their artwork.

When Edvan was asked for help, he imagined finding Dr. Valdemar doing anything but drawing.

“I want to make a good impression. Don’t want anyone to think that I’m talking about animals I’ve never seen in my life.”

“There are, sure, better ways to demonstrate this fact. And come on, the man just wants some medicines.”, he stood up and walked over the desk. There wasn’t a mess on it, but it was certainly a huge mix of anatomy books, props, and miniatures of different animals. It looked more like a fair stall than a desk. “Maybe it would make a nicer impression if you at least had some books about diseases at sight here.”

“Thank you for worrying, professor, I appreciate it. I’m good, I know exactly what I’m doing. And…Finished!”, they take a step back, holding the book against their chest, admiring the concluded work.

Their teacher walked over next to them. The illustration of a stallion skull, making a trio with two other ones which diagrammed the digestive and respiratory system of the same animal.

“Impressive!”, he smiled, groping their shoulder gently.

“I just do what I love.”, Valdemar giggles and turns, walking to their desk with a gracious flourish and finally sitting. “Thank very much for the support, professor. If everything goes right, this will be the first patient of many!”

“Everything will go right.”

Greyback crosses his arms, still smiling proudly of his apprentice. He could imagine that small office in the university becoming a huge clinic someday.

 “I’ll be in my office if you need me. See you later, Val.”, he waved and left.

“Bye, Ed!”, they waved back while reorganizing books the professor blatantly switched and replaced from his desk. But it was more for occupying their hands than for the necessity of putting everything back.

Valdemar was feeling chills on their spine and butterflies in the stomach. They had patients before, but it was their first meeting in their own office. And this client, in particular, was really important. The owner of one of the biggest land properties in the country, and known for the best livestock in the world. The doctor hoped all that work would be worth it and impress the man!

The knocks on the door finally come, and their heartbeat fasts even more. They say “come in”, and follows the man’s silhouette entering the room with their green eyes.

A tall slender cowboy. The man, as to oppose what Valdemar imagined, didn’t look much older than themselves. They were both probably the same age. After a few steps in, the doctor’s eyes fixed on his young features among a beautiful wide smile.

“Howdy! Dr. Valdemar Fawkes, right?”, he extended his hand to them to shake.

The mood, the good humor, and that goddamn smile, everything caught them on surprise. The doctor recomposed, standing up and shaking the cowboy’s tough hand with some mental delay, not being able to hold back a shy gawky grin.

“The one and only. And you… Must be Mr. Gavin Rayfield.”

“I don’t think you can call me ‘Mister’ yet, haha!”, he joked. “Gavin is my father. He was supposed to come here and meet you today, but mom said I needed to learn how does business work. I’m Ludovic.”

“Ludovic Rayfield… Very nice to meet you. Have a seat, please.”

The talk was way smoother than they thought it would be. Ludovic talked about what he needed, and Valdemar answered what they could offer. They would be lying if they said it didn’t feel more comfortable to talk to a patient of the same age, both physical and mental. The things went with no troubles until they got to a certain topic.

“Diagnosis…?”

 “Yes, the diagnosis, of your livestock sicknesses. You have those with you, don’t you?”

“No…”, his voice almost dying on his throat.

“The vet didn’t give you any certain answer?”

“We don’t have a vet.”

“Sorry?!”

“My parents argued a lot about it, and in the end, we never hired one.”

The answer surprises them. But after thinking a little bit, it kind of makes sense. If they had vet working at the farm, they wouldn’t need to ask Valdemar for any help.

“Such a huge land property with a huge reputation and you don’t have a doctor to take care of your animals… I’m sorry, but I can’t give you the medicine without the diagnosis.”

“Can’t I just describe what they have?”

“Mr. Ludovic, there are symptoms that can show up in different diseases. If you just describe their symptoms to me, and I assume what they might have, I’ll risk giving you wrong medicine, which can take from them getting even more sick, developing new diseases, and even to their death.”

The vision of the losses and damages scarred him, the young man touched his chin, trying to figure something out. He was confused about what he was supposed to do, he would normally be asking for guidance to his parents by this time. But he was alone now. Ludovic looked around, observing and admiring the doctor’s office, his eyes filled with surprise and marvel when putting thought over what he saw. His glare stopped over the horse anatomy schemes on the three boards.

His eyes shining when seeing the illustrations, like a curious child learning something new.

“Doctor… You can’t leave the university, can you?”

“Well, that depends on the situation.”

“Would you mind going to our ranch?”

“Pardon me?”, they raised their eyebrows, and the cowboy finally takes his eyes off the boards and back to them, with that beautiful smile filled with hope. “I’m flattered, but you would probably prefer someone with more experienced hands.”

“You never worked with livestock animals before?”

“Of course I did. But they weren’t Rayfield animals.”

“What? There’s nothing different between them! And your recommendation letter was far more impressive than the other ones we received from the university. If I were you, I would not underestimate my mother’s sense of choosing what’s best for our property.”

Their cheeks heated up, and that goddamn smile wasn’t helping cooling it either. The doctor knew how many letters they sent to them, and the names that went along with theirs, including Greyback himself. But they chose Valdemar.

If they had already chosen them, they really thought Valdemar was the best decision for the job.

“Well… If you insist, I may talk to the university so I can go to the ranch and do a checkup on your precious ones.”

“Nice! I’ll tell my father about it and we’ll contact you soon. Thank you, Dr. Fawkes!”

“My pleasure, Ludovic.”

Valdemar escorted the cowboy to the door. They could now see him from a little closer and noticed that he was a little shorter than them, his hair was dirty messy blonde slightly coming out of the hat, and he was a little sheepish once his brown eyes met Valdemar’s greens.

They guided Ludovic until some point in the corridor, and they both said goodbye with good news to tell different people. Valdemar waved to him while already leaning against Greyback’s office doorstep. Their expression was filled with satisfaction and proud.

“I know that face… Did you sell the medicines?”

 “No”, they answered, seeing the professor frowning. “I will sell them. And apply them directly on the Rayfield stallions with my own hands.”

“No…”

“Yes!”

 “Congratulations! Look at you, the apprentice surpasses the master!”, Greyback smiled widely and hurried to hug his pupil. “Your illustrations and all that stuff actually helped, huh. Who would have said… You were thinking about everything, weren’t you?”

Valdemar denied, wanting to sound and look humble. But they always knew what they were doing. They knew all he wanted was the medicines, but they couldn’t waste the chance of showing off and impress a little bit, and maybe get a job for that. _Never underestimate me, professor!_ , they thought while smiling to themselves.

.

.

.

“Dr. Fawkes? Oh lord, I’ve been waiting for you all morning!”

“Splendid!”, they laughed, offering their hand for the man to shake. “And I finally get to know you, Mr. Rayfield. Sorry but, I always wanted to tell you this, I watch the races and festivals with your horses every single year, I just love your work!”

“Ah, I love to hear that! The stallions are my biggest prize. They’re my best friends. Thanks for the support, and thanks in advance for the help, Doctor.”

“You can just call me Valdemar, sir.”

“No way. Mom Always said, ‘respect the doctors, they’re authority’. And my mom always taught me very well, Dr. Fawkes.”

“Oh well, I do not want to disrespect your mother in any way.”

“Ah you bet you wouldn’t!”, he answered with loud laughter, patting the doctor on the back and inviting them in to have a seat at the couch. “But you, you don’t need to worry about that. You may call me just Gavin.”

He seemed to be indeed a sympathetic and funny old man, as opposed to what Valdemar was thinking. And certainly, he was way shorter than they imagined, always seeing him from far at the podiums and stages. But that was cute in its way. Before sitting, they already started observing the rest of the living room. The couch was fluffy and covered by a cheesy ugly-looking blanket, but it matched the rest of the room with its rustic design. On the other side of the room, a fire pit decorated with prizes and trophies. Winning prizes from botanical festivals and agriculture fairs to the livestock festivals. And, of course, dozens and dozens of medals from the best stallions in the country.

Over the rest of the wooden walls, there were paintings of the land property and the Rayfield patriarchs and matriarchs over generations. There were also paintings of dear and famous animals, family friends, and some still life.

In the middle of all that history, there were two rocking chairs, two armchairs, and the couch, laying around the small center table. And on the top of the table, a cute old coffee set that had just been prepared. Valdemar then has a cup, and resume their talk.

“Then so, it is my pleasure to meet you, Gavin. Thank you for the opportunity.”

“No problem, Doctor. I am the one happy for you to be here, you will be much good to the farm.”, he smiles widely, also having a cup for himself. “Times’ been hard, you know. Its been hard to carry all the family’s name weight on my back…”, he says while gesticulating to the prizes around the firepit. “My wife always said we needed to hire a vet, and I never listened.”

“Your wife is a really intelligent woman, always listen to her!”, they answered with a smile full of white teeth.

“You’re a funny one, huh? But you’re right. By the end of the day, she’s always right and my words come back to haunt me.”

Finishing the coffee and the talking, Gavin stands up before Valdemar and opens his arms in excitement.

 “So, wanna know the property?”

“If not bothering, the travel was long and I’m so tired. I would like to rest a little bit.”

“Ah, no problem. Let me show you the rooms, then.”, he then proceeded to guide the doctor through the staircases and corridors. “I have some stuff to do anyway, so I’ll ask my kid to show you the animals and property.”

“I’ll be waiting! Thanks for the hospitality!”

Valdemar enters the room carrying with them some suitcases and some ideas. The window view was a beautiful open field with tomato farms growing over the plains as far as eyes could see. They could see some people working and walking around the farms, taking animals with them, and the stunning stallions they saw at the festivals and races.

_It looks… Peaceful_ , they recognized, letting a low relieved sigh, and throwing themselves on the bed, lying on their back and examining the humble and cozy bedroom. Maybe their mom was right, in the end.

.

.

.

It looked like time and space were confused between itself. There were years of gap between one second and the other, and years of returning in time in another matter of seconds. But Valdemar was there, standing alone, in the middle of all that chaos. They couldn’t comprehend those forms and sounds anymore and gave up fighting against all of that. They just left the timeline tripping over itself, trying to keep the order, and failing miserably.

That gave them an awkward feeling… The lack of sense even in the air was terrifying. They could feel every single drop of sweat dropping down and back up their bangs, back and forward on their nape, narrowing and loosening the gloves. There was nothing they could cling to, no way to control the situation, it was all a big ocean taking their body with the angry waves.

And the screaming. Oh, the nonstop screaming, even when they were awake. Screams of pain, despair, agonizing and strident. The sound waves tangled over each other in knots and producing a horrendous cacophony. In that distorted notion, their shouts mixed with the ones in their head.

And then, silence. The silence that almost made their heart come out from their mouth.

Valdemar woke up with a pair of gentle hands gripping their forearms over the blankets. They felt a gentle caressing on their hair when their eyes widened and then squinted, trying to get used to the light and solidness.

“Today is the day, darling.”, they could hear the smile in the sound of her voice.

Scrubbing their eyelids firmly, finally making sense out of their surroundings, they saw the open suitcases just next to the desk, and the woman sitting by them on the bed.

“Good morning, mom”, they smiled, lying on their side. “Today is the day, huh?”

The sentence was simple, but their tone and face were screaming “Why do I have to do this?”. Of course, they were excited about the new job and to know the farm. But the way there was so long, traveling for so much time sounded so tedious! Their mother just grinned, laid a peck on their forehead, and left, reminding them to have breakfast before finish packing.

Margareth always had the same answer to any type of crisis: they need to de-stress. They need to think about what would be better for themselves and leave those thoughts behind. And it wasn’t about de-stressing the anxiety of going to a new place. It was about _that topic_ , if _that_ dissipates, all the other problems will vanish too.

When Valdemar told her they got a job offer at a cattle farm, the support they received from their mother was bigger than when they accomplished any other things. The happiness in her eyes was beautiful to look at.

Margareth said that the bucolic would bring them peace and lull. Valdemar questioned her a lot of times about how would she feel without them home, about how much they would miss each other, but she always came back to the same “worried-mom” phrases, worrying about her child’s mental health. Her poor baby, who wasn’t that little anymore, still suffered from fears that were so… Childish? Yeah… Yeah, those could be described as childish.

One way or another, they needed to get ready for the road trip.

The breakfast, just as any meal prepared by her, was seasoned with a bit of love, which made everything smoother to taste. But in that specific morning, the food was like a caress on the lips, like a kiss. It was just delicious, and in the first bite Valdemar could feel in the flavor something that said: _“don’t leave me here alone, please.”_

“Mom… You don’t need to hold back because of me, you know that”, they stated, finishing the second bite and a sip of coffee. “I will miss you sob ad. I’ll miss this kind of moment with you. And it would be so sad to go knowing that my own mom didn’t want to open her feelings about it to me”, they rest their chin over the hand, observing their mother going back and forth in the kitchen while trying to hide her face. “Mom?”

“It’s not easy to let you go…”

“Oh, mom… Are you crying?”

“I’m not”, she tried to hold back her tears behind that smile, but the clumsiness in her voice was impossible to hide. Especially after feeling the tall and slim body of her child hugging her. “Valdemar…”

“You talk so much about my mental health, and there you are, suffocating while fighting back your tears. _Tsk tsk…_ ” they opened a small grin, playing with her deep black hair. “Come on, I want your hold too.”

Margareth, realizing it was nonsense to try and fight any longer, turned around to her child and embraced the thin waist, crying over the white shirt and trying to stammer something between the sobs.

“It is hard to let you go off my life, sweetie…”

“I told you to try to find a job there too.”

“I cannot offer anything useful to such a big land property”, she pushed back just enough to see Valdemar’s face again and touch it lightly with the tips of her fingers. “But you… You’re talented, you can fit anywhere. And it will be really good for you. I just have to accept that.”

“If you happen to not be okay and don’t tell me, I will know! I know you very well”, they warned, raising the eyebrows, and retributed the kiss on the forehead from earlier before going back to the table and resume their breakfast.

She would miss her sweetie’s voice, that slender silhouette present in her house, she would miss looking at them and remembering their childhood and their teenage years. The heart of a mother always aching every time she saw her baby suffering for anything in life. Her chest hurts every night when she heard them screaming. She remembered hugging and comforting them in all those agonizing moments… That, fortunately, wouldn’t happen anymore.

.

.

.

Maybe their mother was right, yes, yes.

Finally being able to rest and take care of themselves, Valdemar decided to dress in something comfier and explore the room. There was a working desk, a reasonably big wardrobe filled with extra blankets and pillows, the bed, which they already tested, was very soft and spacious, and they had a nice free area in the center where they could pace alone and put anything they wanted. They didn’t know if they were allowed to decorate the room, probably just at a certain point. But not being in the middle of the accumulation habits of their mother, who filled the rooms with saints and paintings, was already nicer to look at and felt cozier. The decoration wasn’t the biggest of their problems.

Now that they were away from their mother… Who would be there to hug them when the things inside their head became too heavy?

They tried to push those thoughts back while enjoying the ease and warmness of the bed, but without sleeping. From time to time they sneaked at the window to observe the movement of the farm and came back to lying and hugging some pillows. Their hopes of finally distracting themselves only revived when someone knocked on the door.

Smiling and prepping quickly to reencounter that handsome smile from that handsome cowboy, they opened the door and looked for him outside, but their eyes only met a man wearing the strangest attempt of a haircut they’ve ever seen.

“Howdy.”

“Oh… Hello!”, _You’re not Ludovic_ , they thought, but they kept it to themselves as to not sound rude.

“It’s a pleasure to meet ya, Doctor. I’m Raul.”

They remembered hearing about that name someday. Raul Rayfield… He was always present in the livestock festivals, taking care of the sheep. Was that him? He was Gavin’s son too?

“My father told me to go give you the tour. It’s getting dark soon, in probably two or three hours, so we’re better get going now. Otherwise, you ain’t seeing all the animals.”

“Fine… Let’s go.”

It was hard to hide that little pinch of frustration, the one they tried so hard to deny they were feeling. They didn’t want to admit not even to themselves that the beautiful smile of the cowboy stole their heart.

So they left the house.  and Valdemar could feel that fresh breeze of the fields on their face. Ah, that wasn’t the city at all. The smell of grass, of dirt, even the smell of manure embraced them with that provincial air, full of hospitality. The sky was so blue it looked fake, there wasn’t a single cloud visible. The scorching light of the sun gave everything a beautiful yellowish color. It was pretty to look at, but they were starting to feel a light burn on their face skin. Noticing it, Raul gave them a big straw hat, and finally, the tour began.

 He first took them to the fields at the front of the mansion and introduced them to every person they bumped into. In around fifteen minutes, Valdemar already knew who to look for if when needing to send letters, fixing holes in clothes and having snacks.

“You good so far? No questions?”

“I like to keep the questions to the end”, they shook their head. “Please, continue.”

“Well, now we’re going to the livestock part. The stalls are right over there. I’ll show you the horses and we can go riding to the rest of the property, it’s easier.”

Valdemar could feel their heart pounding at the idea of riding the horses. It was that they were waiting so long for. They haven’t ridden for quite a while, they missed the horses from their childhood, back in the day in their father’s family ranch. But the Rayfield stallions were like no other. They could imagine that the experience of riding one of those was something transcendental.

Moreover, their long tired legs were begging for some rest, and for some riding through that gigantic land property! And they have seen practically nothing yet.

Close to the stalls, Valdemar was astonished by that sight. It was just like in their childhood. That beautiful open field for the stallions to run free. Some horses and mules were grazing sparsely, and there was even a mare with her little foal in the middle. And by the field, the huge main structure rises in red and white bricks, it looked like a dollhouse. Long corridors of horse stalls prolonged to a curve away from where eyes could see, the path was full of apple trees, with some children climbing and picking up apples. Lots of cowboys and cowgirls were working there, riding back and forth and greeting them when passing by. Valdemar’s eyes were bright with that nostalgic dreamy vision.

When they finally reached the stables, they only went through the corridor with the small windows that you could see the horse heads through. Raul introduced them briefly to each one of the stallions while walking. Valdemar was frustrated they wouldn’t be able to see the horses from close, to have more contact with them at the moment. There was this one that called their attention. The black eyes of the white mare met their greens for a brief second, enough to send shivers down the doctor’s spine and nape hairs raised.

Passing the stalls, they got to the area where the animals were treated, and after that, the stables for the ponies and mules. In between horses being washed and brushed, there was a huge white shining smile, talking to another cowboy.

That smile and presence brought them a cool breeze on a hot day from the moment they first saw him. Ludovic was brushing the mane of what was the biggest horse they’ve ever seen. It wasn’t just bigger than his happiness when seeing the doctor getting closer.

“Dr. Fawkes! You’re finally here, I was excited to show you our babies!”

“Don’t worry, Ludo. I’ve already shown him”, Raul raised his hand to stop his brother from going further, holding his forearm, and a small frustration sigh left Valdemar’s lips. “We’re just passing by, we need two horses. We’ll continue the tour while riding.”

“I know you didn’t show them in the right way, bro”, he pushed him back and continued. “So let me take it from here. I was going to leave anyway.”

“No, you weren’t! I saw you brushing Aberline over there.”

“Aberline’s fine with it, thank you very much. Doctor? What do you say?”

It was already hard to resist anything that man would ask. But his smile and the smooth talk weren’t necessary since that tour was already tedious enough. They would rather be guided by a mole than to keep listening to Raul licking his father’s boots and talking about how amazing the property was, repeating the same phrases over and over. It’s a small world for two Rayfield stans, and even Valdemar refused to act like that. And to top that, the idiot refused to refer to them with the right pronouns.

 “That’s a splendid idea! I would love to know the horses from a little closer.”

“See? I got this, Raul. See you on dinner!”, he said while already guiding Valdemar back to the stalls.

That sequence of happenings was like an offense to the younger brother’s eyes. He left trying to hide those firm steps and grumpy expression (and failing miserably), saying goodbye with a stiff voice. There was some tune in his voice that said: “wait ‘till I get my hands on you”. All Ludovic did was laughing.

“Tell me, was he too annoying? He always tries to be the funny one…”

“No. Actually, everything was a little tedious…”

“Believe me, even if he tried to be funny, it would be tedious”, he warned, and then they shared an accomplice smile. “C’ mon, I’ll show you the horses. The right way.”

“After you, Ludovic”, they gave him a gallant smile, letting the cowboy guide them inside and through the corridors and paths of the stables.

They could do that all day. Ludovic said that, if it was up to him, he would brag about the life with the horses and explain the story behind each stallion in the ranch, they would stay there until tomorrow’s afternoon. He then let Valdemar get close to the animals and feel them from touch, he let them be curious and ask, and search for any horse in particular they wanted to know.

In the beginning, they wanted to see all the horses. Each detail was fascinating to their eyes, which shined with every new information. As long as they walked further into the corridors, they started more enjoying the moments in silence and touching than actually talking about the animals. They just came back to that curious mood when their eyes met that beautiful mysterious mare with that thrilling gaze.

“How about this marvelous thing?”

“Careful!”, Ludovic stopped them before getting close to the stable. “This is Opal. She’s our little princess, but she hasn’t gone to any contest or pageant yet, you might not know her.”

“She’s beautiful… She is indeed a _moonstone_ , look at this hair, this mane, oh my…”, they looked at her from bottom to top in complete awe, excited to watch her from closer. “But why mustn’t I approach her, though?”

“She’s been a little skittish and bashful recently. Nothing serious, just so you wouldn’t get scared”, he warned, observing their wondering stare, and decided to start getting closer slowly. “I see you liked her, I’ll try…”

Her reaction to the cowboy’s presence was jolting back in distress. But to the doctor’s, it was curiosity.

Valdemar started getting closer to Opal, walking in front of Ludovic, and she paces forward too. The two of them examined each other like similar creatures trying to socialize, trying to comprehend what the other one was and why they felt so attracted to each other. She looked like a marble sculpture, nature’s work of art. The mare’s face was almost theatrical, the little darker marks in her white body brought a special charm to the whole “artpiece”.

The doctor barely tried touching her, and the mare was already headbutting their hand, asking to be petted like a kitten. They laughed mildly and caressed her make gently, feeling the softness of the hair flowing like liquid silver between their fingers and molding around the gracious movements of her head.

“Look, Ludovic! I made a friend!”

“Would you look at that… The hothead loves you!”, the cowboy was shocked, placing the hands on his hips. “I think we have a candidate for your riding. Do you wanna try?”

“I would love that, please.”

Ludovic goes out searching for a saddle in the boxes outside the stable and gets back already riding a brown horse. Initially, Valdemar dismissed the help, they dress her on the saddle with barely any effort. But, for the lack of practicing, it was a little hard for them to get up, and finally needed some help. And oh, feeling that firm strong cowboy hands holding their waist didn’t help their legs stop trembling.

Their expectations were on point. The sensation of being back on a stallion’s back was more empowering than anything they’ve ever experienced. They couldn’t say if it was the nostalgia or if there was something special about the Rayfield stallions. Or something special about Opal. Only sitting still on her was already worth the long travel and tedious tour with Raul earlier. When the trotting started, even the pain on the legs due to hitting against the saddle was irrelevant compared to the feeling of being riding again.

During their way out of the stalls, Ludovic was telling his stories with the mare with the tenderness of a brother. They were born on the same day, the cowboy helped his family treating her since he was just a little boy. Normally the proud of the family was on the huge horses, the insanely fast ones, the horses for sports. The equitation horses didn’t receive much attention. But Opal was different.

“We are just waiting for the right moment for her debut. She’s a really special animal, you’re a very lucky person for captivating her, Doctor.”

“I indeed feel really lucky! And for the love of God, yes. Wait for the right moment. A beauty like this needs to be explored delicately”, they caressed her back smoothly, before taking a look at the field they were going to.

Ludovic started guiding them through the livestock sector. They could see some milking cows grazing in an even larger field, some workers milking them while talking, and even in such a simple moment, the cowboy had stories to tell. From his childhood adventures, stealing milk and disturbing the cows, to family stories with famous cows and oxen. There were endless stories on other farms as well, even the little lake with some ducks and gooses had its tales.

When they got to the rabbit breeding farm, Valdemar’s heart just melted at the sight of the little creatures leaping in that little green field. Some mommies with tons of babies around them laid here and there, other older ones sparsely playing around, and lots of them being fed by two caretakers. Ludovic, then, concluded that this was probably a nice hour for a rest.

They sat on the ground, gathered some lettuce and carrots, and started feeding the little ones.

“My mom said that the bunnies will be a nice way to bring kids to the family business, especially for advertising the therapy services”, he continued talking, smiling at the sight of the doctor playing with a little white ball in their arms.

“Not just the kids. I would love to have any kind of therapy that involves this cute cotton balls”, they played with its nose, laughing when it sneezed.

“My father sees it in another way. He thinks they will be a nice way to have soup for dinner.”

“How crude. I wouldn’t be able to eat any of this little cutie faces”, they raised an eyebrow, while bringing the bunny close to their face. “Would you?”

Instead of just answering, Ludovic looked around to see if the caretakers were near, and whispered: “I’m vegetarian. Don’t let my father know.”

“Oh, no problem. My lips are sealed.

“Dad would probably put me to sleep in the barn if he finds out. He thinks that growing up seeing the slaughter toughens up your character. That wasn’t my case”, he shrugged. “I think the rabbits are the only ones he ain’t really worried about. The diseases are killing lots of them.”

“Oh my, we can’t let that happen, can we?”, Valdemar turns their face back to the bunny on their lap, pretending to talk to him and making Ludovic smirk. “Don’t worry, buddy. Doctor Fawkes is going to save you and your little friends, I promise!”, they swore, holding it’s paw, and finally letting it run free in the small field. “Ludovic…”

“Yes?”

“You noticed your brother missed my pronouns, didn’t you?”, they asked, back to seriousness.

“I did… Sorry about him. I just ask you to be a little patient, please.”

“It’s okay. He didn’t seem to understand when I corrected him.”

“I can’t blame him completely. When you go to the city so frequently like me, you end up learning some things. And Raul rarely leaves the farm.

“Well, I can’t blame him neither. This place is a paradise”, they opened their arms, smiling widely.

“The best thing to do is to let things flow naturally, my parents are a little difficult on those topics too… I believe that going slowly and carefully would be the best for yo… _For everyone_.”

“Thank you for caring, Ludovic.”

“It’s no more than my duty, Doctor”, he tipped his cowboy hat with that goddamn charming smile again.

They shared a tender look for a few moments, that soft grin hypnotizing them each second of staring, and the lovely and curious air in the doctor’s expression giving the country boy a trustful feeling.

“You can call me just Ludo, please.”

With their heart warm and their mind full of hope, observing that situation and those possibilities of a new life, they answered:

“Well then, please, call me just Val.”

They finally shared an accomplice laugh, that intertwined itself with the start of a new friendship, a friendship that galloped together to the property as night fell.

Valdemar liked to think that the very start of everything was in those stalls.

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to ask your help, I'm almost sure I got their pronouns wrong at some point in the text, but I couldn't find it again while correcting. If you spot it, please tell me in the comments, I don't want to cause any problems or confusions :/
> 
> To see more of my work and what I'm thinking for this project, check out my Tumblr! https://thearcanistparadise.tumblr.com/


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